Controlling Emotions


In a previous post I mentioned that people should learn to control their emotions and feelings.

For more reasons than one, it is necessary for humans to learn to control their emotions in order to keep evolving.

Another thing that is the need of the hour is for people to learn to understand what they are reading or listening.

In any of my posts, I have never once stated or asked anyone to suppress their emotions. And I never even tried to force anyone to control their emotions based on some elusive thought or for some hidden agenda.

Sometimes I simply don’t understand the people’s need to start abusing and fighting with someone who has a different, more evolved opinion.

Controlling Emotions doesn’t mean you have to suppress them. It simply means that you should, if you want, learn to control and regulate them so that they don’t play an extensive role in your life.

It is not about avoiding a certain ability. It is simply about regulating that ability and using it in a way that would be helpful and provide you with a positive gain in the future.

When someone tells you “Expectations Hurt”, you accept the idea of ‘Not Expecting anything from anyone’. Or at least, you try.

But when someone goes a step further and suggests you to learn to control and regulate the emotions, the base cause of all the expectations and everything else, you simply start abusing that person. Why?

Do you think abusing and calling names would prevent that person from having an opinion?

If you do, don’t you think it is too presumptuous of you?

Learning and exploring new possibilities is the primary function of Human Brain. If we were simply to work on a certain set of principles, we might as well have had a pre-programmed binary processor instead of the most complex and highly sophisticated Neural Network.

And writing anything doesn’t require emotions. Some people simply use LOGIC as the basis for writing or performing any other task for that matter.

Everyone has emotions. It’s not like those who are capable of controlling and regulating their emotions have simply removed their Amygdala.

No one expects you to be able to control your emotions by tomorrow. It is a process. An ever-lasting process. It takes time for one to finally be able to be in control of his or her faculties.

And considering the idea of being able to control emotions, let me give you an example.

Millions of years ago, every Human functioned and lived on the primary emotion of fear and killing. The primitive humans feared everything they didn’t understand and killed other beings or even each other for survival. But as they evolved, their psychology evolved too and most of them learned to control those emotions and their impulse reactions to certain situations.

It’s not that we don’t still possess those emotions, it’s simply that we have learned to control them overtime.

Categories: Psychology

10 replies

  1. After growing up in an abusive household, several abusive relationships, both boyfriends and friends it was my husband that taught me not to fly off the handle if someone had a different opinion. Hed taught me you can agree to disagree. I wish I had realized this all my life it would have saved a lot of heartaches.

    Liked by 2 people

  2. I was a part of a conversation regarding that post and enjoyed the thoughts of others. Understand that my reply was to the respondent who responded to me. Again, exception was taken by said person, for I respect lucid meaningful thoughts. Not that I am a saint, mind you.
    There are so many opinions on every topic that opening any will lead to another’s thoughts or beliefs on the topic. One must assert a proposition to learn. Similar to writing a thesis. Finally, when I spoke of suppression, again, it was directed at the contention of the respondent. But it is important, in my opinion, to offer this distinction when considering the control of emotions. I did not disagree, just elucidated a thought.
    I appreciate your works, thanks.

    Like

  3. “Control” is harsh imo. Implies that there is something that should be silenced. Maybe “modulate” “allow” “notice” “observe” might not attract negative attention/trigger. I think emotions are meant to be felt, given the freedom of expression, to be seen, heard, completely. So many of has been silenced because some caregiver was not comfortable with our display of emotion. Maybe it was too messy for them, maybe it brought them back to their own abuse/trigger of their childhood. Emotions are messy. People are messy.
    Now, there’s a time and place for safe release. NOT unloading on others “acting out” but taking the time privately to process through what we are feeling. Where does the feeling live in our body? Does it have something to say? A message? Can we bring love and understanding to our ______ emotion? We need to stop blaming others for the way we feel or the way we don’t feel. Emotions are an inside story. Thanks! You’ve just inspired my next post 💜

    Like

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